Disclaimer: There be swear words afoot. I get pretty vulgar when I'm angry. Or happy. Let this be a disclaimer that for most posts you will see swear words. Moving On.
I knew today was going to be a cold one and in the late afternoon the temperature started to drop drastically just like all the weather channels said it was going to. My main concern was for Richard to have a ride home from work so he didn't have to walk in the cold. Me having the car, despite it not having a properly functioning heating system, I knew I would be fine. I text him around 4:00pm just to be sure, and he responded back saying he was good and someone was going to be driving him home. So here I was at work looking at the clock tick by and thinking it might be good to run out early and beat traffic.
As I opened the door and Mother Nature blasted me in the face with her cruel frozen winter wind, I walked to my car. Our crappy but still functioning car. I opened the door and started to put the key in the ignition, already thinking about what music I was going to sing my little heart out to when I turned the key...and nothing happened. NOTHING FUCKING HAPPENED! Our poor little dying Sookie (Yes I named our car) didn't even make a whimper. I tried again thinking it was a cruel joke and it would start. It had to start. I finished work, and it was cold and getting dark out. It had to start.
But it didn't.
And what does Paula do when she starts to panic and her eyes start to water, with the tears that will inevitably take over all her senses. I call my Sister.
Karen: Hello my Sissy. (In a very clearful voice)
Paula: My car won't fucking start. (quietly)
Karen: Oh no. (Speaking to her husband) Paula's car wont start. (Back to me) Like at all?
Paula: Nope (quietly) What the hell am I suppose to do?
Karen: Call CAA. Do you have CAA?
Paula: No (I can feel the tears starting but I try to control myself)
Karen: How can you not have CAA?
This was said in a 'Really Paula' kind of way. My sister is very aware of my lack of car expertise, as well as the fact that all cars hate me. Seriously, I have personally owned two cars and have gotten them both, individually I might add, towed over three plus times. This current car has left me and passengers stranded in not only Orangeville (forty minute drive away) but also in the wonderful drug capital of Ontario, Oshawa (over two hours away).
So my sister, my own personal Tom Cruise if you will, came to my rescue with the help of her hubby. I should point out at this point that my sister is basically dying from a cold and still managed to come to her baby sisters rescue.
As I walked back inside my work defeated and on the verge of a meltdown, but pleasantly warm, I waited for their arrival. I explained to Richard what had happened and that the most common explanation was that it was so cold outside that our car was frozen and wouldn't start.
My rescuers came, saw, did their best to fix Sookie, but did not conquer Mother Nature and her whorish winter frost. So we piled into their truck and left Sookie to brave the winter weather on her own. It was at this point where I waved pitifully to my car.
Paula: Bye Sookie.
Jeff: Sookie?
Paula: Yes I gave her a name so she would know she was loved, and wouldn't do stupid shit like this to me. I guess it doesn't work though.
Karen: Maybe you should try giving your cars stronger names. Like Brutus or Butch. Then they won't die on you.
So as we all crammed into their warm and toasty truck and they dropped me off at my apartment, I was mentally thinking about how the hell we were going to get through tomorrow. Richard works at 6:00am and I work at 8:30am. Both of us working in opposite directions. We eventually decided that Richard would take a taxi and I would ask to hop a ride with my Father in Law as we work at the same location.
Phone conversation with Richard and his Dad. His Dad's lines are improvised as I don't know what was said but this is what I gather.
Richard: Hey Dad, our car is at MicroAge as it wouldn't start and Paula and I have no way of getting to work tomorrow. I'm going to take a taxi into work but can Paula get a lift with you?
Dad: What time does she start? I'm actually off this week but I can pick her up if she wants.
Richard: She starts at 8:30am so I guess a pick up at 7:15am.
Dad: Sure. What happened to the car?
Richard explained what happened and hung up the phone. We were once again saved. As Richard and I are discussing the fact that he needs to go to a bank and pull out some money for the taxi tomorrow, while I start on dinner, Richard's phone rings.
Richard: Hello?
Kerry (Richard's sister): What time do you start?
Richard: 6:00am but I have to leave at 5:30am.
Kerry: Ok Mum and I will pick you up, and drop you off. We don't want you taking and spending money on a taxi.
Richard: Really, thank you.
Paula: *Yelling loud so they can hear me* I love you. We will give you gas money.
Kerry: Tell Paula to shut up, she can give us cake instead. See you tomorrow.
Richard and I are truly blessed to have our family. Thanks you guys.
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